Energy Regulation

"I never sleep cuz sleep is the cousin of death." I have to sleep to live, but when I sleep I'm not living.

Being tired is tricky too. I can be tired but if I get excited about something energy pours forth from somewhere. But there is an absolute point of exhaustion where I know that I must go to sleep.

The tiredness that haunts me is what I feel when I think about a seemingly arduous task that I need to complete. Something I may not want to do, but has to get done. Immediately after the thought of it my psyche feels downward pressure, weakens, and says go to sleep.

But if I power through it, by the strength of the reasoning portion of my mind (this must get done or else there will be worse consequences, etc.) I have a burst of energy and then I can attack the next task.

I have to frame it in terms of a sword fight. I have to constantly fight off the oncoming tasks or else I will be overwhelmed.

The trickiest part is distinguishing the physical tiredness from the psychological tiredness. Which is which? The best thing I can think to do is to eliminate one of them and the only one I can effect is the physical. What happens if after a regimen of regular sleeping (7-8 hours) + regular exercise the tiredness remains? What then? Can't say for sure until I try it.

+ in the meantime, how to reconcile this potential personal experiment with young adulthood, Tel Aviv night life, and a desire to keep up with what's happening in music.